MANY BLESSINGS TO YOU AND YOURS THIS SPECIAL SEASON AND ALWAYS

STILL TALKING!!!!!!

And Even More...Of What They Are Saying About

"A Dollar Five-Stories From a Baby Boomer's Ongoing Journey"

"Vivid details bring these 24 short stories, poems, and commentary to life as the author provides a unique and personal view of the history of Oakland and herself.."

Mills College, Mills Quarterly, Winter 2015

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HULAGIRL ON THE MOVE

HULAGIRL ON THE MOVE

WHERE IS SHE THIS TIME???

MORE OF WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT "A DOLLAR FIVE....."

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MORE OF WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT  “A DOLLAR FIVE-STORIES FROM A BABY BOOMER’S ONGOING JOURNEY”

“It never fails to stun me, a white woman who grew up in the peace n' love post civil rights era, when I hear about the blatant bullying African Americans had to put up with as background noise on their own personal journeys. Yet Bize-Boutte's writing paints the details into the scenery with a light touch, the focus being on blossoming into personhood in a colorful city. The title story, "A Dollar Five," takes us to a fine edge of emotion where one time period gives way to another on a routine trip to the movies in the 1960s. With her deft and detailed crafting, this is one writer to watch."  K. C. 11/3/2014

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AHHHHHHH!

HULAGIRL OUT MAKING FRIENDS

AS THE CROW FLIES: A LESSON IN WORKPLACE INTEGRITY

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 AS THE CROW FLIES: 

A LESSON IN WORKPLACE INTEGRITY

 As a baby-boomer, I am sometimes in the honorable situation of being asked to mentor a member of the younger generation.  I always go into these partnerships with high expectations for my mentee as well as for myself.  The bottom line is, if they are successful, even in a small way, then I feel I have contributed to the greater good.  However, there are times when these relationships don’t work out.  This tale is for the mentors out there who in their zeal to be helpful may miss the signs of a bad pairing; mentees who do not fulfill their responsibilities in the partnership; and how, in this case, a crow delivered a demonstrative conclusion.

I have been at this executive management, organizational consulting, strategic planning, mentoring thing for more than 40 years.  I have been on both sides of the equation: helping people with clear leadership attributes polish their practical skills and helping people who have excellent skill sets enhance their leadership and interpersonal acumen. Even now, I am still surprised and humbled when, from time to time, someone tells me how much I helped him or her in his or her career.  However, these good feelings and experience would not be strong enough to salvage this particular situation.

Not long ago while working as a contracted supervisor for a small organization, I hired, and at her request, began to mentor a thirty-something woman.  She had been looking for months and had not been able to find a job.  Of all the candidates I interviewed, she was clearly the best in terms of skills needed for the position, but it was also clear that she was a bit unpolished when it came to the interpersonal.  I decided to take a chance and figured we could work on the latter to help her become a valued and well-rounded employee.

At first, she appeared to an eager student and sought my advice on an almost daily basis.  But once she was “in”, this employee became silent and secretive.  As the months went by, she aligned herself with others in the organization and even though she was hired to provide staff support to me as well as others, she would only sporadically answer my emails or phone calls. Up to that point, I had just given her the benefit of the doubt, thinking that her new work relationships were a part of her attempt to be savvy, although a bit cutthroat, to solidify her job and move up in the organization. It was clear that she had severed our ties with each other.

 Her attitude got even worse when others recognized her as the only one in the organization with her much needed skill set.  But soon the whispers began about her tendency toward gossip and her perceived betrayals of coworkers. Her approach to getting ahead in the workplace ignored one of the cornerstones of success: integrity.

There have always been people who scratch for crumbs at the expense of others.  There always will be. They have come to believe that continuing on their path without wavering is integrity. By that definition a serial killer has integrity.  But I believe the real tenets of workplace integrity have been hijacked and need to be recaptured.  One can still be successful and continue to practice the following:

Loyalty:  The landscape here has changed for sure.  Loyalty to employers was destroyed along with the loss of loyalty to employees.  When Ronald Reagan dismantled the air traffic controllers union and employers began to renege on promised employee pensions, the younger generation of workers was left to come up in a “no loyalty” culture. Younger people just do not believe that employers will do what they say they will do and they have a point.  But let’s differentiate here between the old employee loyalty, which manifested itself in longevity, and the new loyalty, which is to individuals who help and support you along your path, which may include many jobs.  Overlay that with the overuse of social media and the resulting lack of face time with real people in the flesh and you are left with little or no connection to the importance of individual loyalty.  Yet people still have the ability to feel individually betrayed and when you do this in the workplace, no matter how good you are at your job, it can be your undoing.

Character:  A wise person once said that what people will remember most about you when you leave this earth is your character.  If you become known as a person of bad character, you will have a difficult road ahead. Employers have choices and when they check references and get a response that says, “She’s really good, but she’s a pain in the ass”, they may just take a pass.  And just because a former employer can’t lawfully provide a reference like that, you have to be mindful that a coworker or a colleague can.  You would be surprised what people can find out about you and what people will say.  Chances are you are not so special in your area of work that employers will always accept negative character traits that could end up hurting you more than those stupid Facebook postings.  And, if you have a job and are displaying these bad character flaws, you could end up losing it.  Just think about the now ex-CEO who was recently recorded berating an employee in front of other staffers, and the high level manager whose 10-year mistreatment of employees finally led to dismissal. 

Honesty:  Let’s face it.  No one wants to work with a liar or a person who thinks they can be deceptive when it suits their purposes.  You can only play so long before you play yourself out.  Manipulating situations for the success of the organization requires a good chess player. Being a good chess player takes experience and time and can be done while being perfectly honest.  A liar can’t be trusted and trust is foundational to positive and mutually beneficial relationships. Rather than lie, learn to enjoy the power of silence.  Stay away from lying to secure a position or to hurt someone else.  It has been, and will continue to be, career suicide.

Respect:  The worse thing anyone can do in the workplace is to outwardly disrespect his or her superiors or coworkers.  When you disrespect someone, unless they are comatose, they feel it. And it does not feel good.  And the more you make people not feel good, the worse it will be for your future. People may not remember what you did at Tick Tock Company in ten years when you need that reference, but they will remember how they felt working with you. Respect costs you nothing so use it freely and genuinely.

Now I realize, that as a baby boomer, my thoughts about workplace integrity may not always match with the younger generation, but I believe that what I have offered here will continue to stand the test of time.  I know there are countless examples of “successful” people who lie, cheat and steal, but I choose not to be one of them. I say this because even though the world of work is never without its rough patches, these tenets, shared with me by my mentors, have served me well.

So you are wondering where the crow in the title of the story comes in.  Well here it is.  One day, after my contract had ended, the employee in this story and I ran into each other on the sidewalk in front of the office. We were in the midst of one of those “fake chatting” moments when a shadow fell upon us.  We both looked up to see a very large black crow flying right over our heads.  The shiny bird seemed to look over its shoulder at me as it flew past.  Suddenly it circled back toward us and that is when I heard it.  The squishy, loud and unmistakable plop of bird droppings. One large glob hit the small space of sidewalk between us.  I was sure I had been hit but it appeared that we had both been missed completely. Not even our shoes had any trace of the bomb that had just been dropped.  We made quick mention of the fact that we had escaped unsoiled as the crow continued on its flight above the tiles of the building roof and beyond.  I swear he looked back at me again but this time with a smirk on his beak.  Our conversation quickly returned to work and other things and how we had to get back to whatever it was we had to do. 

I saw it just as she turned to walk away; the shimmering white of bird crap.  The “what’s that white stuff in bird doo, that’s bird doo too”, type of stuff. The thick chalky white was in a wide swath starting in the thickness of the hair at the top of her head, down to the bottom of her right buttock cheek.  There was a small space between the end of her hair and the beginning of her collar where it appeared to have gone down the inside of her blouse.  “Oh my, God, the bird got you!’ I screamed.  Her first instinct was to check her hair and in doing so her hand was filled with the nasty white substance. Trying to disguise her panic, she instinctively wiped her hand on the front of her pants.  Now she had the bird’s relieving on the back and front of her clothes. The look on her face was a mixture of embarrassment and rage. Above us, the crow had returned and was circling again.  Seeing this and thinking she was about to be attacked again, she started running toward the office door, yelling,” So good to see you”, as she made a poo-filled grasp on the doorknob.

I looked up at the crow that now seemed to be hovering and waiting for acknowledgement. I swear he seemed to be smiling.  I smiled back.  As he flew over the rooftop again, I whispered thanks to my shiny black supporter.  In his dramatic and extremely visual way, he reaffirmed my belief that just being good at what you do will never be all you need to be truly successful or safe.  How you comport yourself in the workplace will always be a part of a good work ethic. 

And as though this was not obvious enough, this incident proved to me that if you crap on others to achieve position, sooner or later, someone or even a black crow, will crap on you.

Copyright © 2014 by Sheryl J. Bize-Boutte

WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING......

WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT....

"A DOLLAR FIVE- 

STORIES FROM A BABY BOOMER'S ONGOING JOURNEY"

"I could not put this book down....an excellent read, full of joyful moments. Her varied experiences and relationships are truly heartfelt and dripping with imagery."  D.G.

"The author writes so vividly in these short stories about her different experiences growing up.....not only did she provide a glimpse into another era in America, through the eyes of a child, she revived memories of my own childhood.  I laughed out loud at some of the stories and learned through others."  D.L.

"A great summer read...bringing back many memories and making me smile." M.H.

Available at Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle as well as other booksellers

http://www.amazon.com/Dollar-Five-Stories-Boomers-Ongoing/dp/149938310X/ref=pd_rhf_gw_p_dnr_1

SHERYL SAYS......

MAKING UP FOR EATING THOSE FRIES!!!

HULAGIRL EATS HEALTHY

Sheryl Reviews "Murder In The First"

Sheryl Reviews “Murder In the First”

I don’t usually do reviews, but this new show on TNT has been on my mind since I saw the first episode.  I haven’t watched it since.

I was initially intrigued by the two stars of the show: Kathleen Robertson who did a strong and marvelous job in the STARZ political drama “Boss” with Kelsey Grammar, and Taye Diggs, a wonderful and beautiful to look at actor who has honed his skills to perfection.  (I have to admit that Taye Diggs was the main attraction…. I mean what self respecting woman would not want to watch Taye Diggs in anything? ) But let’s not get lost in those brown eyes and that megawatt smile.

The premise of the show is that someone has murdered a dude named Cody (Lame plot reminds me of “you killed Kenny” from South Park, but did I mention Taye Diggs?) and over the course of 10 episodes that crime will be the only one investigated to its conclusion by San Francisco based lead detectives Taye and Kathleen.  I will not go into detail about how the Taye Diggs’ character becomes a widower in the first episode except to say that it was dripping with unrelenting suffering on the part of his dying wife, played by Anne-Marie Johnson, and capped off with his ridiculously quick closure about it all.

In the show, the city of San Francisco is glaringly bright and clean with soft welcoming ambiance and pristine model-like people in every nook and cranny.  It is when the investigation takes Taye and Kathleen on a “field trip to Oakland” as the chief of detectives describes it, that things go seriously wrong.

Their sojourn to the other side of the bay begins with them talking amicably in the car as they cross the beautiful bay bridge.  Halfway across, the bridge suddenly changes into a rusty, rickety, decrepit structure as they arrive in Oakland.  (I did not recognize this bridge and have never seen it around here so I figure it must have been spliced in from “Once Upon A Time”)  Their backs stiffen as they drive to their destination and all conversation stops to allow for wide-eyed looks at the sinister and foreboding terrain. It is here that the camera lens seems to be covered by a gray stocking as everything, even the sky, has the appearance of being dipped in dirty water. 

They arrive at the neighborhood where they are going to interview the victim’s parents. The houses are all old, surrounded by broken fences, and in need of paint.  None of them have grass or flowers.  There are no pets or children.  A snarling, menacing Latino-looking male in a tee shirt with ill intent or suspicion in his eyes inhabits every corner they pass.  Finally they reach the house they are looking for and each touches their weapon for comfort as they alight from the car and approach the front steps.

The house is so raggedy that I fully expect the “before he got rich” Steve Martin from “The Jerk” to answer the door when they ring the bell.  It turns out I am not that far off.  The white woman who opens the door to let them in is a sweaty, greasy mess, dressed in a dirty housedress.  The only thing authentic about this scene is the wonderful built-ins and woodwork that form the backdrop.  Soon her husband appears and he is also among the unwashed and is wearing a grayish wife beater that was white only before it was purchased.  Both of them have hair that is matted and stuck to their skulls like glue.  They are not really able to help much with the investigation because guess what…they haven’t seen the victim in years and of course they are just, well…. (spoiler alert)  not even his parents but really his grandparents and not quite bright on top of all of that.

As I am watching this, I am getting more and more angry.  How are we STILL depicting people with these stereotypes and why is Oakland the center of this freakishly inaccurate portrayal?

The journey from light to grey when the characters go from San Francisco to Oakland is an ignorant and biased director’s use of the “heaven to hell” metaphor.  It just does not apply.  The visual enhancement of a lie to define an entire city is the real murder here.  I mean, have the people who put this crappy show together ever been to Oakland?  I suspect not.  These irresponsible, racist and damaging depictions only serve to plant false beliefs about people and places that deserve better. 

Taye Diggs notwithstanding, the good people of Oakland certainly deserve better than this.  We all do.

HULAGIRL ON THE MOVE

Hello:

My name is Hulagirl.  I was rescued from the Target parking lot in San Leandro, California in  late June 2014.  Since then I have met many wonderful people and have been to lots of beautiful places  in the Oakland-San Francisco Bay Area, and would like to share some of them with you.  Keep checking back every now and then.....you never know where I might show up next!

ALL SMILES BEFORE PANCAKES!!!!!

FRENCH FRIES: THE FOOD OF THE GODS!!!

HANGING WITH NATURE IN THE HILLS OF OAKLAND CALIFORNIA

POSING WITH  A SAN FRANCISCO VIEW

ON TOP OF THE WORLD IN OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA

A DOLLAR FIVE-STORIES FROM A BABY BOOMER'S ONGOING JOURNEY

http://www.amazon.com/Dollar-Five-Stories-Boomers-Ongoing/dp/149938310X/ref=tmm_pap_title_0

MY BOOK, "A DOLLAR FIVE, Stories From A Baby Boomer's Ongoing Journey," NOW AT AMAZON.COM

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A DOLLAR FIVE

Stories From A Baby Boomer's Ongoing Journey 

My book of stories, poems and a bit of commentary

thank you so much for your support!

GOODBYE CURLY TOP

GOODBYE CURLY TOP

Sheryl J. Bize Boutte

February 11, 2014

By the time I saw my first Shirley Temple movie, she had been in the business for almost twenty years.  Starting out as the child star who brought smiles to beleaguered Americans still trying to recover from the Great Depression, she began a new life in, what were by then, old movies for baby boomers like me.  

The little girls I knew in the 1950’s did not see Shirley Temple as a relief or distraction; we saw her as one of our first icons of girlhood.  She was well spoken, smart, inquisitive, and talented.  All the things a girl should be.  She set the tone for us and we followed suit. She was on screen proof that asking questions of adults was not taboo and that curiosity was a way to learn and solve problems.  Even if we did not process it quite that way at the time, it left an imprint along with other things we carried into adulthood.

 It was Shirley who set our little girl fashion trends with the swirly dresses, coveralls and little cardigans.  It was Shirley who made us request Campbell’s tomato soup with animal crackers on a regular basis. It was Shirley who made me beg my parents for tap shoes until they gave in.  I could not dance a lick, but I remember my father’s best friend Smitty dancing with me up and down the three steps to our front porch just like Shirley did with Bill “Bojangles” Robinson.  

But the most endearing memory was her hairstyle.  Those “Shirley Temple Curls” would be why we called her “Curly Top” and  they would be emulated in many forms from the time we first saw them, to this day.   This is me at age four with my mother’s version of the famous coif. 

So it is with the same smile that I wish you safe passage, Curly Top.

 Rest well, my friend.

SELF NUMBER ZERO

Self Number Zero

Sheryl J. Bize Boutte

February 5, 2014

You believe the sun serves

As your personal light

And when the moon comes up

It is merely a reminder from the universe

That you need your rest

You travel through the world

With complete freedom

Riding the wave of distraction

Hiding in the cracks of memory

Pimping the familial

The friend

The weakness

Undetected until you strike

Your smile seduces

Your prowess seals

The manipulation completed

Leaves gaping mouths

Fractured feelings

Closed accounts

Without a care

You continue your quest

To have it all

At our expense

And when we are empty

You will simply move on

Until it is all gone

And as you think it should be

 You are all there is